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[Music]

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in this audio segment I go over a story

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about a strange humanoid encounter with

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small little creatures we also talked

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about some YouTube conspiracy drama with

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the secured team 10 channel thanks for

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listening and I will talk to you later

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all right everyone this is what we're

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going to be doing here it's all

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happening all right I got some humanoid

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encounters here and I've been going

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through some of my uh my online Kindle

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books and their dating habits because

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that I've given up Wendy and I'm just

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now reading about human encounters like

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what it's like to be dating what it's

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like to maybe touch another living

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creature I don't know I have to read

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about it in the book my balls hurt think

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about the balls please mmm oh my god

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can you get a ball massage I think what

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Siri yeah in a relationship I think you

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can't you gotta be any one of those okay

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oh you could get a [\h__\h] I don't want to

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do that I don't know where their hands

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have been mm-hmm okay I got a story here

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this comes from 1990 in from Russia and

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this was the witness was a former

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doctors assistant from a very religious

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area of Russia and one night she had

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gone to the balcony got on her knees and

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cried and prayed the following prayer

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God make me powerful like a magician I

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would create order on earth we have too

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many murders robberies lewdness

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depravity and violence after she ended

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her prayer she stood up and walked back

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in into a room after she entered her

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room she heard a voice inside her head

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go out into the street bring him home

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immediately as if guided by some type of

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unseen influence she walked out side her

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home not even bothering to close the

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door or switching off the lights behind

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her she only took with her small lit

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candle she stood outside her home on the

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street wondering who was supposed who

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she was supposed to bring home the next

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moment she saw a reddish dog looking up

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at the sky the witness also said that

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the sky was filled with a strange cloud

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with a dark Center and dark edges

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that was emitting light she stared at

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the strange cloud for quite some time

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and said to the dog are you sick

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come into my home as soon as she said

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that a strange cloud began to move sang

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way above her she and the dog entered

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the home she closed the door but it

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didn't but did not switch on the light

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because he didn't turn off she then

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heard a strange voice inside her head

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bring me water she she thought to

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herself what kind of water

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should I get boiled or not as soon as

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she entered the why would you give a dog

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boiled water I'm assuming at this point

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the dogs talking to her ok ok

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why would the dog want boiled water I

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don't know maybe make me you want to

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make sure that the water is clean and

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sterile yes possibly good dog does any

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yeah any good dog is as soon as she

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entered the the kitchen she saw standing

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about a meter from her a small dwarf

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like man or gnome no more than 30 to 40

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centimeters high you know I'm a I'm an

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American I don't know how tall thirty to

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forty centimeters is yeah what the hell

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is that can someone do a rough

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calculation for me to centimetres and

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feet how many [\h__\h] long is that thirty

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centimeters is 11.8 inches point forty

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point nine eight feet forty centimeters

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is 15 almost 16 inches ok so just about

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not that tall that's that's a small

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little dwarf actually gnome that's a

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gnome creature surprise she yelled we

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don't have people like that the creature

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answered I am NOT a person I am a sky

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warrior hmm the witness then asked are

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there many of your kind

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the creature said yes our kind is large

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in number the witness then asked and why

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did you visit us the creature answered

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your earth is ill and is sending out

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impulses to the universe warning that

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she is dying

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you should not take oil and gas from the

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earth because it's like taking

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from a human organism the alien added

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the current I guess earth is losing its

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specific weight so aliens are hippies

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too according to this story yes

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I don't like us doing fossil fuel stuff

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but we're deciding that what's that

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doesn't mean that shitty John Cusack

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movie is true it's possible the 2012

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yeah yeah 2012 yeah well the the in that

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movie the crust becomes liquid because

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of the mantle got all liquefied and

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everything like that so the witness then

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said we have very wise scientists and

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they would like to enter contact with

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you but in disdain and scorn the alien

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said no we will never we will never

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enter into contact with your scientists

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I guess he sound like this no you don't

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have scientists they are all insane

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criminal and deprived and corrupt they

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don't know what they are doing this is

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not for your mind to comprehend the

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mysteries of the black star and this

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sounds like a woman is having some kind

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of religious conflict with inside of

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herself the one goes the women then goes

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on NASA do you have your own planet this

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creature says yes the dwarf like alien

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answered we have two planets on opposite

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sides of the Sun the witness then asks

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do you have females the creature

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answered we have them but we do not have

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sex with our females the witness then

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asked how do you obtain children or

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procreate she received a strange answer

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they are programmed in our kind we have

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females that have girls and the men have

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boys we visited all the planets we need

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warriors he did not elaborate on that he

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then added that humans don't die they

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just transform their outlook in a

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spiritual manner the human body is

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similar to a caterpillar in which the

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butterfly hatches and then your spirit

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goes on as it floats away it much like

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the butterfly he then added and remember

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all humans live according to a

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that was established in advance your

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kind lives as you wish but in the

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universe are only that would remain in

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accordance with the program you would

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judge yourself

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we will accompany you a planet is

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prepared for you in the fiery rings it

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sounds pretty goddamn ominous huh yeah

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she goes on to converse with this beam

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and then at the at the end that same

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night a fiery globe was seen hovering

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over this Russian town over several nine

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story apartment buildings in the morning

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the witness met a female neighbor who

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told her that she had seen a small

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glowing shape object over this person's

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home and everything else remains a

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mystery at this point very bizarre are

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you on board Joe yeah totally I'm bored

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with this one but this is this is one of

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these one of these weird stories where

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this is not like some kind of weird gray

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large.i healing this wouldn't looks like

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a foot tall gnome it came down to warn

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her for whatever reason not to take

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fossil fuels out of the earth yeah these

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are like ecological aliens no where did

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you find this guy again the story yeah

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yeah this is a in a book called human

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encounters 1992-1994 okay yeah I have

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lots of these stories very curious and I

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often when I go through these books

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they're all on my Kindle so I'll go

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through and search for penis or sex

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there's not a lot there's I do have one

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it's a longer story I'll probably read

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it next time about about this this

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person getting abducted and actually

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witnessing looks like what I can

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describe from the story this person who

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was abducted they brought on board and

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he witnessed like clones being birthed

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in these weird chambers and the aliens

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would go up to these

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clone babies in stick needles in their

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penises or peanut nice yes maybe their

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balls hurt Oh baby maybe that's a cure

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for ball ache Ami's please if you're

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listening come down and relieve my ball

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ache

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please come stick my balls those damn

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please it's interesting that's why I've

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heard about the short small aliens you

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know but we're instructing this poor old

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Russian woman various things for her to

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deal with no that sounds like a

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stressful day so uh more on to some more

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UFO news that's when the bee sting

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encounters I have a bunch of others I

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have one on alien research I have one

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about trolls I don't want to read any

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more come on baby haven't I read enough

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so far today I mean you can keep going

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if you want to we're only at an hour in

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20 and we can keep chugging on we get

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plenty of news I'm gonna go on with this

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headline here which is a world-famous

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UFO Hunters security team ten under fire

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over claims his videos do not prove the

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existence of extraterrestrials oh my god

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this is just not coming out the Sun the

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Sun UK is is running the story saying

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the secured team 10:00 on YouTube who

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has almost 800,000 subscribers it is not

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really releasing authentic UFO footage I

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can't believe this this is mind-blowing

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to me hmm if you take a look at their

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channel they if they if these videos are

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authentic they have the most

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mind-blowing [\h__\h] you know is absolutely

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incredible but it can't be it's it's of

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my opinion that they run a hoax channel

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it's my opinion and when I found most

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interesting about this article I think

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it is a hit job says look there their

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video on the UFO in in Arctica that's

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religious to pond

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this thing is really not what appears to

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be this is Photoshop what I found to be

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interesting is that this hoax channel my

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typing this hoax channel secure team ten

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their YouTube channel makes almost six

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hundred pounds a day

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Wow put now that's pretty good that's

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not bad

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but now BS alien and UFO [\h__\h] that's how

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many how many dollars is that clown baby

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it's almost like $850 do you think

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inversion how many dollars are in 600

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pounds sixty-three cents well I have 752

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and 52 cents so get [\h__\h] yeah fight a

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fight to the death Google and Yahoo

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seven hundred bucks a day to run a fake

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UFO Channel 754 fake UFO check that's

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amazing dude that is am awesome yeah

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it's a video this guy only has 800

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subscribers so you can you could almost

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imagine what PewDiePie a hundred

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thousand subscribers PewDiePie has 50

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million subscribers so he's probably

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making what eight thousand to maybe

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fifteen thousand a day yeah well you

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could get is I think they did release

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and I think Wall Street Journal as we

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talked about earlier did release like

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some of his earnings for the year he was

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breaking it in big-time

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four million dainard year a year I can

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see that four million a day four million

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oh my god that's cost what's four

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million divided by 365 we'll never know

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the answer to that one Joe fifty eight

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point nine zero four one thousand

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dollars that's crazy

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wasn't that far off are you or not that

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is just bonkers man so this we should

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start putting out fake Bigfoot and fake

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UFO videos I think so and mostly about

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so so alien and calm so EPN the alien

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penis Network the Sun you keep posting

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up the story about secure team 10 then

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secure team 10 posts you know a response

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and I found this to be incredible

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you know they posted up a response

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saying look our videos to our knowledge

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are authentic and real videos like come

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on come on guys

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I can we reach out to security and AM in

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an accident they put some obviously

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After Effects products in here they're

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using like a Photoshop re they're using

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a video editing look I get it they're

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doing it for all the money and I don't

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know why they have these these comments

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sections blow up and are there that many

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gullible people out there Joe I would

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say so I mean the Bigfoot community is

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super real these people are very adamant

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about the Bigfoot thing yeah I love it I

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think people like that they dude we

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played on the show it's got the arm for

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the frozen arm his comments are always

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really good to the Gator King never

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never got back right quick Tyler from

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secure team 10 wrote of course I don't

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post fake videos anyone who subscribes

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to me and watches my channel on a

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regular basis and I have nearly 800,000

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of them know that I'm very passionate

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about this research and I have grown

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popularity precisely because of this

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so there's he may not be lying there so

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those videos are real the special

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effects he puts into them are fake like

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I post real videos clown baby

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but the real videos of us on zomboid

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which is a fake universe this geyser

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Carson is [\h__\h] words yeah you're a

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little angry about this he didn't come

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up with it first I think there's still

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time I don't think I don't think that I

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could do this um I think he would be

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disingenuous I would

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like a fraud yeah I Donna said don't

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think I can look myself in the mirror

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because I actually like the topic of

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UFOs like they discuss it with a little

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bit of fun entertainment by take it

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serious

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I think the discussion series and post

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up fake videos that people are gonna

329
00:16:09,769 --> 00:16:08,919
spread around as disinformation doesn't

330
00:16:13,169 --> 00:16:09,779
appeal to me

331
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although 600 pounds a day or 700 pounds

332
00:16:18,949 --> 00:16:17,470
a day does appeal to me yeah that's a

333
00:16:21,869 --> 00:16:18,959
lot that's a lot of [\h__\h] money guys

334
00:16:25,139 --> 00:16:21,879
extra income man you could turn that you

335
00:16:26,369 --> 00:16:25,149
keep pumping 750 dollars a days two

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hundred and seventy three thousand

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00:16:31,949 --> 00:16:28,149
dollars a year we can split that three

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ways he's serious yeah 750 if it's 758

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00:16:38,639 --> 00:16:33,279
days that what they said or is it per

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week a day yeah that's 750 two hundred

341
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and seventy three thousand per year

342
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Bigfoot dicks calm get it let's do it

343
00:16:47,699 --> 00:16:45,399
three ways is 91 kl2 yeah let's do that

344
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I mean I supplement I would totally yep

345
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I would quit my job and we could just

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talk about crypto dick Bigfoot penis

347
00:17:00,659 --> 00:16:58,600
hoaxers yeah I would I don't see this

348
00:17:02,189 --> 00:17:00,669
the moral quandary we have the technical

349
00:17:06,059 --> 00:17:02,199
know-how Joe to make some probably

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00:17:08,159 --> 00:17:06,069
pretty good fake videos we could do that

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00:17:10,590 --> 00:17:08,169
we both went to our school for video

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graphics and video editing we probably

353
00:17:16,889 --> 00:17:14,529
could pull it off pretty well do de lien

354
00:17:20,549 --> 00:17:16,899
power coming do you think you could live

355
00:17:22,319 --> 00:17:20,559
with yourself though oh yeah ooping

356
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people as long as it was anonymous and

357
00:17:26,460 --> 00:17:24,490
people didn't really know who I was like

358
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if I had like an alter ego and I called

359
00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:28,089
myself you know let's start a new

360
00:17:35,639 --> 00:17:30,490
YouTube channel called very real UFO

361
00:17:40,970 --> 00:17:35,649
footage let's call it authentic UFO

362
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footage or we can be secured team 11

363
00:17:46,710 --> 00:17:44,980
yeah team 9/11 I like that

364
00:17:49,710 --> 00:17:46,720
let's do that let's get secured team 11

365
00:17:52,350 --> 00:17:49,720
and start posting videos but it has to

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be open to the the cryptid thing because

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I think that's if you limit yourself to

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the UFOs and you're ignoring an entire

369
00:18:00,490 --> 00:17:58,450
community of other I agree you know what

370
00:18:02,350 --> 00:18:00,500
I have a guy and I have a guy whom

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00:18:04,630 --> 00:18:02,360
monster suits and elders videotape that

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00:18:07,030 --> 00:18:04,640
you know what we could do is we could

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just be security max and you could do

374
00:18:13,900 --> 00:18:10,310
parody videos of blatantly fake things

375
00:18:16,150 --> 00:18:13,910
that they do okay I like that I like

376
00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:16,160
that that there's a little bit more like

377
00:18:20,740 --> 00:18:18,890
trolling the trolls right yeah you

378
00:18:22,240 --> 00:18:20,750
probably get a lot of views too there's

379
00:18:26,050 --> 00:18:22,250
a little bit more honor in that I like

380
00:18:26,500 --> 00:18:26,060
that I mean to that sure and now that's

381
00:18:28,360 --> 00:18:26,510
right

382
00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:28,370
nothing's not up let's talk about it

383
00:18:32,650 --> 00:18:30,620
let's see if we can do that we're gonna

384
00:18:35,340 --> 00:18:32,660
hang up the our big dumb mouth is going

385
00:18:38,380 --> 00:18:35,350
away we're gonna talk about crypto penis

386
00:18:47,260 --> 00:18:38,390
exclusively we kind of already do that

387
00:18:55,990 --> 00:18:51,370
that's uh that's Peter cane you can ask

388
00:18:57,340 --> 00:18:56,000
Peter King yeah yeah yeah it is all

389
00:19:00,280 --> 00:18:57,350
right we should probably get onto some

390
00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:00,290
headlines here window we have a

391
00:19:06,070 --> 00:19:02,330
half-hour of headlines to do let's let's

392
00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:06,080
do this [\h__\h] yeah tons okay so much news

393
00:19:09,490 --> 00:19:07,970
to get to we've done everything we had

394
00:19:14,450 --> 00:19:09,500
to do let's let's [\h__\h] do this

395
00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:14,460
[Music]

396
00:19:24,649 --> 00:19:18,090
my mind okay thank you for your call

397
00:19:25,879 --> 00:19:24,659
yeah okay all right this is the the part

398
00:19:27,980 --> 00:19:25,889
of show where every does some headlines

399
00:19:31,039 --> 00:19:27,990
and you guys let me know what you want

400
00:19:33,529 --> 00:19:31,049
to talk about I think my ball pains

401
00:19:36,220 --> 00:19:33,539
going away good that's right I think

402
00:19:40,100 --> 00:19:36,230
talking about it it's very therapeutic

403
00:19:43,609 --> 00:19:40,110
and maybe are you praying about the ball

404
00:19:47,239 --> 00:19:43,619
pain mmm when you rearrange no it's

405
00:19:50,210 --> 00:19:47,249
still there oh man damn it everybody

406
00:19:51,529 --> 00:19:50,220
send positive energy to Mike's balls

407
00:19:52,609 --> 00:19:51,539
oh wait that might actually make it

408
00:19:53,299 --> 00:19:52,619
worse I actually know when you guys

409
00:19:55,519 --> 00:19:53,309
listen to this

410
00:20:02,419 --> 00:19:55,529
can you just think about my balls like

411
00:20:05,539 --> 00:20:02,429
give it good vibes please thank you as

412
00:20:08,389 --> 00:20:05,549
if they don't already well we know most

413
00:20:11,779 --> 00:20:08,399
people who listen to the show listen to

414
00:20:17,149 --> 00:20:11,789
it on the toilet that is a statistical

415
00:20:22,879 --> 00:20:17,159
fact how do we get this metrics toilet

416
00:20:24,980 --> 00:20:22,889
I'm calm check this out check the stats

417
00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:24,990
on toilet I'm calm they people check in

418
00:20:29,570 --> 00:20:26,210
when they're listening to the show

419
00:20:32,830 --> 00:20:29,580
that's a nap right there yep bye do you

420
00:20:37,940 --> 00:20:32,840
mean oh dude we can buy toilet time calm

421
00:20:40,039 --> 00:20:37,950
really yeah forget that [\h__\h] you you you

422
00:20:41,690 --> 00:20:40,049
get a nap and you check into the toilets

423
00:20:43,549 --> 00:20:41,700
that you're in you get to tell your

424
00:20:46,279 --> 00:20:43,559
friends the way you're doing it making 1

425
00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:46,289
or 2 or like well let us know what app

426
00:20:49,909 --> 00:20:48,450
you're using because socially I want to

427
00:20:52,519 --> 00:20:49,919
know if you're on Instagram or if you're

428
00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:52,529
listening to the show like check in yeah

429
00:20:56,029 --> 00:20:54,330
check in tell us what you listening to

430
00:20:59,269 --> 00:20:56,039
what you're doing take a picture of your

431
00:21:02,509 --> 00:20:59,279
turds take a picture your feet your feet

432
00:21:04,820 --> 00:21:02,519
take a selfie take a foot see and

433
00:21:06,289 --> 00:21:04,830
because your pants are down you already